Whether you liked, loved or loathed the recent incarnation of the worlds greatest detective, DC’s golden boy or the rest of the Super Friends, we can all agree that these films are not doing well. Batman Vs. Superman was not the launch point studio execs had hoped for and promptly sent them into a panic that resulted in the Hot Topic graffiti-esc mess that was Suicide Squad. Each of these films currently stands with a less than 30% score on rotten tomatoes. There are countless interviews of a jaded Jordan Catalano wondering where his scenes went and a revolving door that is the director’s chair on the upcoming Flash and Batman projects. For whatever reason, things aren’t working out for DC’s attempt at a shared universe. This may be because the studios involvement is a little heavy handed, the scripts are simply not good or, and more likely, they are decent but the comic book movie fan is spoiled after the consistent success that is Marvel Studios. Marvel has it’s own faults totally, but they have successfully tapped into this market and there is literally no room for DC products. But fret not friends, for we have the solution and have carefully crafted a letter to the big wigs urging them to heed our advice. A letter we are completely confident they will never see, nor want to.
Dear Detective Comics, Warner Brothers Entertainment and heck let’s just umbrella it, Time Warner in general,
Stop what you are doing and just make Lego movies.
Hey DC…buddy ol’ pal. You make good comics AND you make good TV (here’s looking at your CW’s The Flash ;-)) but let’s be real, your attempt at a shared universe is not quite working out is it? Marvel has effectively laid claim to that continent of franchise real estate and there isn’t even a dock to park your Batzod. But that’s okay. Let them have it. Not all is lost. For you my sweet, sweet little national treasure you, have a secret weapon. LEGOS!! Seriously just make Lego movies. Lego Green Lantern, Lego Superman, Lego Wonder Woman etcetera etcetera…Maybe continue with the Aquaman film because mermen are dope especially if they’re Khal Drogo but everything else just place in the capable hands of the Lego Batman team.
Lego Batman is the ultimate. It’s funny, heartfelt and completely self-aware. There are no origin stories and enough easter eggs to melt my little nerdy heart. Did you notice when Dick Grayson was sporting the Night Wing suit? We see you. Not to mention the awesomeness that is sassy Barb Gordon’s commentary on the “BatGirl” debate. #GetItGirl. Lego Batman appeals to a wide range of audiences, kids, adults, fanboys…Bookmans employees. There is something for everyone in this fun and hilarious film. An amazing cast including Rosario Dawson, Michael Cera, Channing Tatum and Zach Galifianakis as well as Will Arnetts literally made for a Batman animated feature deep raspy voice. References to past DC properties and the slew of unexpected baddies that made appearances had me laughing out loud and squeeling in delight.
So throw in the towel DC. Let Ben Affleck go and retire The Joker for like, 10 years, please. Just for while. You’re time for a Batman reboot will come. But you have to practice patience. You are not Field Of Dreams. If you build it they will not come.
Lego Batman Super Fan currently praying to Zeus that Wonder Woman turns this all around.
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